Last night I dreamt that I was pregnant- quite pregnant, I have a vague notion that I was exactly 20 weeks in.

And then my stomach just started to deflate a little bit, and I told you that I didn't "feel" pregnant anymore. I remember telling you that when I had the miscarriage before Audrey. You told me then not to even "suggest" that idea.

In the dream, you, and the unrecognizable others that so often appear in dreams, assured me that I was still pregnant, but I just kept feeling my belly and it just kept feeling less pregnant- less full of life.